The best burrito in the Hamptons continues to be from 7-11 in Sag Harbor!

I got another round of nasty comments about the New Blue Parrott in East Hampton. Overpriced, tiny portions, bland and too much attitude are the most common complaints. Sure, Mr Bon Jovi or is it Mr. Jovi occaisionally shows up but if you’re actually going to eat it sounds like that isn’t the place where you want to go. It’s obvious the Hamptons needs a good southwestern or mexican restaurant… why can’t we get one???

I forgot a few weeks ago to mention a great place on the water in East Hampton. While I love the food and view at Bostwicks, I hate the wait. So, if you want to have food with a great view without waiting for 45 minutes, try Harbor Bistro. The prices are actually pretty decent and the menu is ecclectic and interesting without being so exotic you’re scratching your head. My personal favorit is the “seared tuna with soba noodles.” AWESOME! They also have a really friendly and competent staff. Harbor Bistro is located on Three Mile Harbor Road, next to East Hampton Point (where I recently had one of the worst meals of the summer— yes you can ruin a basic chicken breast)! The view is above left.

Finally, This Saturday… Stuff to do. Mercedes-Benz Polo Challenge at Two Trees Farm on Hayground Rd, 4:00 pm to 6:00 pm A portion of proceeds from the Mercedes-Benz Bridgehampton Polo Challenge will go to South Fork Breast Cancer Coalition. The VIP tent continues to play host to a large overdressed and overly liquered crowd that cares absoloutly nothing about the polo players, horses or anything else other than who else is in the tent and how much cooler they are!!

And for the un-chic set. Fireworks on 3 Mile Harbor this Saturday starting at 9pm. If you have friends on the Harbor, call now!

UGGGGH! I’ve been busy but I have some rental stories from hell!!

Sorry, I haven’t been around lately. I was busy doing this and doing that and I had a house full of Canadian Guests!!! They fly south every summer and stay for a weekend and usually bring good gifts… much easier than Canadian Geese!

Anyway, I’ve been talking to a few friends and myself included and here are a few rental stories from the war zone!

A couple has rented a 10,000 square foot house south of the highway called the land lord and started berating him!! Why?!?! Because there was NO TOASTER! Let’s just put it this way, the rental was well over $100k for A MONTH… and they’re pissed about a toaster!!! When my friend the landlord stated that indeed there was a toaster over in the kitchen, the horrified response from the renter was “Are you kidding, EVERYONE knows there’s a difference in how toast tastes from a toaster oven!”

Hmmmmmm… ok. On to the next. Things are a little slow in the purchase department lately although it IS picking up. None the less, some top agents are still taking out folks looking to rent…even short term. I recently had one who was looking at rentals up to $80,000 for July and August. When they finally found a house, where do you think they came in at?! Yup, $25,000! The landlord was gracious and declined the blue light special to his house. His comment, “I won’t travel and I’ll just stay home.”

Another story from the NW Woods where a house was infested with wood ants. Just imagine the horror of the agent who showed the house which was asking for $18,000 for the month of August, only to find piles of wood shavings all over the house and on top of mirrors and dressers (apparently that’s what happens with wood ants. When the agent apologized for showing the house in the current condition, the potential renters said, “I’ll take it but I want a bigger discount!”

A story from East Hampton, a tenant rents a house with a heated pool. The pool is heated by propane which comes in tanks and is delivered on an automatic basis. Well as everyone knows the weather has been a bit chilly lately. Well guess what happens when you run your pool gas heater all week?! It runs out of gas!!! Now the tenant who calls on Saturday is angry because she has a pool party for her 7 year old on Sunday afternoon…and the kids will have to swim in a cold pool! “You need to do something,” she yells at the landlord. Who actually can’t do anything… as anyone who has ever called Pulver gas on a Saturday afternoon can tell you! Anyway, enough for today, I have to get back to work. I promise I’m back!!

They’re being mean to Boo!!!

(getting ready for action and a donut!)

Warning… danger…apparently the town of East Hampton is a little cranky these days and they’re aiming their ire at “man’s best friend.” Did they just say gat that bitch out of here!? Understand, every Saturday and Sunday my girl Boo goes to the beach to hang with her buddies; Bailey, Bailey (yes, apparently that liqueur is quite popular in the Hamptons thus many owners with booze on their brain have named their dogs) Tucker, Woody and Kipper. Well according to the town, you have to be off the beach by 9am. In the past, there was a little room for those of us who have issues with time management…. BUT NO LONGER! Slightly chunky high school students are now making their summer bucks issuing summonses to owners who fail to get their pooches of the beach by 9:01am!!! I know of a few people who have already gotten “busted” and were shocked to see that its not just a fine, YOU HAVE TO MAKE A COURT APPEARANCE! Something tells me, we’re about to buy Bill McGintee a better lawyer! Well today’s blog is short, sweet and to the point… and yes I told you so!!

Finally a real estate note… I know of a bank owned property south of the highway in the Georgica area. It orignally came onto the market at about 9 million dollars and is now about 50% off. Let me know!!!

Bikini Busters!!!! The best baked goods in the Hamptons!

I have long complained there are no good bakeries in the Hamptons. Ever since Ina Garten closed the doors on the Barefoot Contessa, I’ve been searching the East End tirelessly looking for the next great coconut cupcake. Ok, yes you can buy the box kit but it was forever ruined when my sister Gina decided to make them as a surprise for me! Yes they were a surprise… a surprise like being stuck in the Sahara without water. This is the same sister who confused the abbreviation for a tablespoon with pound while one time surprising me with pasta dinner!!! But enough about my sister’s culinary clumsiness. Ok, one last jab…I shingled a roof once with her pancakes! But alas, there are good baked goods. First up on my list is BREADZILLA on Wainscott Northwest Rd. Great focaccia breads and in my opinion, the only place to buy a birthday cake this side of the canal. No, the prices are not for the faint of heart but they put their money where the butter is!!!

For cookies, try Levain Bakery on 27 at the Wainscott shopping center. The oatmeal raisin are my favorite. They each weigh about 3 lbs a piece.. or at least they feel like it… but they are awesome!!! The chocolate chip rock and the peanut butter…incredible. They’re not open during the winter and hours are choppy at best. But if you catch them open, the fumes alone are awesome and they should charge admission! You can also get the cookies fresh out oven… wait I have to go wipe my drooling chin.

Finally ROUND SWAMP FARM, what can I say. The cinnamon buns, the sour c
ream coffee cake, the brownies, the triple berry pie and the corn bread muffins….. well lets just say I know them all intimately! The farm is and has been run for over 40 years by Carolyn Lester Snyder who along with her family create the baked goods and meals fresh daily. It’s a small shop but it covered from wall to wall with quality stuff. It’s not a baked good.. but it is baked… their Mexican cheese dip is just plain wrong!!! It has to be about 4000 calories but it’s worth every scoop on your tortilla chip. The market is located on Three Mile Harbor Rd in East Hampton and is opened 9-5 Mon-Saturday… 9-1pm on Sunday. I know they accept cash, visa and I’m hoping soon will assist with financing!

Speaking of financing… in the … It’s not my listing but I know of a great deal section.… south of the highway property… it’s a bank sale and an amazing deal. Contact me for details!!!! In fact, a few more distressed properties came onto the market last week… I’m about to start a weekly mailing here. Let me know if you want to be on the list. E mail me!!!!