One of the fun things about writing this blog is the fact it’s a blog.     This isn’t done for any other reason than my own amusement.   I can write thoughts and impressions on just about everything, except relatives.   That being said, today I’m just jotting some really tangential thoughts about living on the east end.   In no particular order of importance are my unrelated musings about my little part of the world this summer.

Life in the fast lane…….

1)  Do they really need speed traps on Route 27 when the average speed on weekends is about 10 miles an hour?     Seriously, I’ve noticed this over and over again.   Considering traffic is worse this year than last (yes, we say this every year) I don’t understand.    Maybe there* not actually speed
traps and instead just looking for the next Range Rover to go by with an inexperienced driver texting like mad on the way to Tracy Anderson.   Speaking of which….

2)  Wouldn’t it be great if they opened a Planet Fitness next to Tracy Anderson in Water Mill!?    I don’t know why but I just find this idea so appealing.   Come to think of it, let’s open a Ben and Jerry’s on the other side.

3)  I’m over screaming children in restaurants…. when I was a kid, my parents would have killed (me) if I ran around and screamed in a public space.   But then again,  the only two restaurants my parents ever took me to were Rustler Steak House and Perkins Pancakes.   Anyway, we digress.   The bottom line is I’m not spending top dollar to eat out and have your kid scream in my ear!  When my nieces and nephews were little and screaming, I wouldn’t go to do dinner with them so I’m sure as hell not having dinner with your kid!  I know I sound cranky but whatever.    I also want to say your kid isn’t that cute!

4)  There is nothing better than taking a boat at twilight and heading to dinner.   Especially when it’s someone else’s boat!!!

5)  Is it really worth $100 for a pound of Lobster Salad?

Season’s Greetings… it could be July 4th!

6) If you’re being honored by a particular charity and asked to make a speech, please make it about the charity and not about yourself.  “I’m so busy but I find time… my personal assistant has been swamped…. my new shoes hur!”  UGH! Really?   Hamptons residents are very generous and love supporting the charities of their choice and…. squirrel… make sure to buy tickets for Gimme Shelter Animal Rescue benefit next week it’s a good one… also the LGBT Network’s Sunset on the Harbor….. but please don’t mistake my donation as an invitation to go on about YOU!

7) Finally,  I was taught long ago you never go to someone’s house for dinner empty handed.    I think it’s a nice practice.   But for the love of g-d, if you’re going to re-gift the bottle of wine you received two weeks earlier at your dinner party take the old tag off.     Oh, and by the way if I’m the one who brings said bottle back to your house, please don’t let everyone know!   Maybe I didn’t like that cheap garbage you gave me!!!

*yeah I know it should be they’re… I’m just getting even with the grammar police!

Avoid the Soulpsychos …. Plus, the Latest Threat to Property Values!

While we still lament the departure of Tiffany a few weeks ago. We (royal) are taking solace in the fact that there is actually something cool that took its place.   I mean, it could have been a Kardashian pop-up or worse yet another real estate office!  But alas, that’s not what we got! Instead we have something to make the Hamptons a little more civilized on Saturday and Sunday mornings during the season, Peloton!   OK, what exactly is Peloton?   It’s the cure for the overly aggressive Lululemon wearing…. Range Rover driving… Vitamin water drinking…. Soul Psychos!   Rather than jockeying online to reserve a spot at an overly crowded spin class, you can instead buy one of Peloton’s bikes for about $2000, pay a small monthly membership and join in via-video for one of a dozen or so classes a day live from New York City!    The bikes come with a video screen where you monitor the class and have your stats sent back to the studio, so don’t try reading the paper while you pedal.    They’ll know if your sweating or riding like your grandmother!   I took a look at one of the bikes at the store on Main Street East Hampton and this stuff is cool! But don’t worry, if you’re Internet is slow… thank you Optimum…. you can download and store classes on the monitor’s hard drive!     If you’re curious, take a look at this video.    I know I want one of these!  Here’s the link!
Could this be bad for owners of historical homes!

Meanwhile, if your’e fit, you’ll be living longer and if you’re living longer you can protect your property values!  SAYYYYYYY WHAT???!   I kid you not!    As if the real estate market weren’t confusing enough, between potentially rising interest rates and an unpredictable market now you have to worry if someone has died in your home!   OMG!  I can hear it now  “Mrs. Freeling, while my clients love Cuesta Verde, this house is not clear… and my buyers want to offer you 25% off of your asking price!” Now, I don’t know about you but I’m not sure I buy the whole ghost thing.  I’ve only seen one in my life and that was after taking an ambien with a margarita!    If you think I’m joking, check out the website DiedinHouse.com!    I know it’s a very catchy name, right?  Its kind of like listing your home on overpricedgarbageforsalebyowner.com!

Finally, some new restaurant reports coming later in the week!   Plus…. go see Conviction at Bay Street Theater!   Some of the best performances of any show on any stage anywhere!


Put down the cookie! There’s 40 some odd days till Memorial Day!

You bought the beach pass, you have the Vilebrequin, the Herve Legere and the Birkin.    It’s official you’re ready to hit the beach, as long as you don’t have to pass a mirror first.  Yeah, all of those holiday cookies, turkey, ham, brisket and chocolates have finally taken their toll.    Well have no fear, I’ve done the research for you and if you’re willing to put on your sneakers you’ll be looking like Keira Knightly after a juice cleanse in no time!

It wasn’t that long ago when a new spin studio that I can’t remember it’s name (unless I read one of my old postings) opened and disappeared faster than the free food at a real estate brokers open house.   This time around Westhampton Beach’s CrossFit Hamptons is going into the location.    I stopped by the other day and apparently  classes are already underway.  If you want more details on times and class schedules you can visit their website.   www.cfhamptons.com   If you mention P-11 for some reason they’ll even give you a free week.

Also, some of your old favorites are back and ready for the Summer of ’13.    I’m getting tired so I’m just going to give you the lowdown on some of the more popular places to work up a sweat on the east end.  In no particular order…..
1) SOULCYCLE – 68 Newtown Lane, East Hampton.   The funky spin classes that you can hear on the street are back again for another season.   www.soul-cycle.com
Best Reason to Go – It’s one heck of a workout and the instructors are more like coaches than drill seargents.
Reason Not to Go – Cult like following.  Friends of mine talk about SoulCyle like it’s the Scientology of fitness and that just scares me.
2) FLYWHEEL – 65 Montauk Highway, East Hampton next to the bowling alley.  Also in the Summers at Sag Harbor Gym, 1 Bay Street Sag Harbor.   This is the place with “stadium” bikes where they post your workout on a monitor for all to see.  So if you’re looking for mellow workout this isn’t where you want to go. www.flywheelsports.com
Best Reason to Go – A great work out and some good celebrity spotting at virtually every class.
Reason Not to Go – They post your work out on a monitor and that’s not fun when you’re trying to sweat out the alcohol from the night before!
3) B East – 199 Main Street, Amagansett.   Call it spinning with a twist or an angle.  B East features “core bikes” which actually turn and twist to give you more of a workout.   I have to admit, they’re a little scary at first for the uncoordinated like moi but if you just relax you’ll eventually get the hang of it.   www.eastfit.com
Best Reason to Go –  A more casual and fun atmosphere.  Not everyone there is in Lululemon!
Reason Not to Go – It’s next to Mary’s “friggin” Marvelous!  A workout doesn’t count if you have the amazing tuna salad followed by a coconut cupcake chaser after the class.  Screw the class I’m hungry!
4) Barry’s Bootcamp – 352 Montauk Highway, Wainscott. Now I’ve never been but they have locations everywhere from London to LA.  According to their website “Since 1998, Barry’s Bootcamp has revolutionized group fitness by delivering “The Best Workout in the World” to a legendary following, including many celebrities.”   Their gyms also feature “night club lighting, urban décor.”  Hmmmmmm… I’m not so sure about that last part.    www.barrysbootcamp.com
Best Reason to Go –   Easy parking in the Wainscott shopping center.
Reason Not to Go – It’s a boot camp!!!
Finally, everyone has been talking about those two Wall Street guys that were stupid enough to leave notes trying to cut out the broker after being shown properties out east.   Do you really think this is the first time this has happened?

No more EH Village beach passes…. and a new fitness studio (sort of) in Sag Harbor!

It’s official, East Hampton Village has officially ran out of 2011 Non-resident beach passes. So if you don’t already have one, it’s Indian Wells for you. But before you head out there make sure you at least have a town pass. There are plenty of those.

Well it’s beginning to look a lot like spring time in the Hamptons. The crocus’ are starting to pop up, some trees are budding and the stores and restaurants are getting prepped for the influx of summer visitors.

One of the more interesting renovations or expansions going on right now is wellNEST (yes, it’s supposed to be spelled that way!) in Sag Harbor. In case you are not familiar with the shop, it was started by Richard Ash, MD, dedicated to organic and sustainable well being, from vitamins to juices and even eyewear. It’s philosophy is all about better living inside and out. Well now they’re opening a WellNEST fitness studio. Set for a May 1 launch and hoping to give Lululemon a run for their money, the studio will feature BHAKTI YOGA, a spiritual approach to the exercise that will also incorporate natural oils and aromatheropy (if my research is correct). Anyway, if you want more information give WellNest at call at 631-899-4600.

Oh and speaking of telephone numbers, Sag Harbor is apparently out of 725 exchanges. So, now 725 is the new 212! Be afraid of a slew of foreign and alien 3 digit extensions heading to a neighborhood near you!

Finally, they’re getting ready for business at the old Farmhouse/Laundry restaurant. Apparently the former bartender and manager of Nichols, Colin Keilor is getting ready to launch a new restaurant at the East Hampton location . From what I hear, they’re looking at a Memorial Day opening. I don’t know what the name of the place will be but I wish them the best of luck getting it together. I always loved the space at the Farmhouse/Laundry/Purple Cow but having been in there a few months ago, I can tell you the place was looking a little beat and needed a ton of work.