Yeah, that’s me up top… CENTER!

Summer in the Hamptons …  a time for sitting in hours of traffic on route 27.   A time for attending overpriced benefits and rubbing shoulders with walking wax figures.   A special time when other annual occurrences like budding flowers, warm breezes the privileged 20-somethings getting sick on the streets of Montauk are common. It’s also that time of year where you get to remind yourself how completely inadequate you look in that bathing suit.

But before you break out the Barry Manilow and Carpenters albums… remember you don’t have to look like the before picture on the back of that comic book.   The east end is a great place to back in shape and stuff that gut into a wild bikini! Biking, jogging and back yard swims are some of the easiest ways here to burn the calories and fight the fat.    But if you’re like me and require a little more motivation from an instructor or hot gym goer next to you, take note.  Hamptons  Chatter is here with 10 of the best places to workout this coming season.
1) Flywheel Sports – East Hampton located at 65 Montauk Highway and Flywheel at Sag Harbor Gym, 1 Bay Street Sag Harbor. The original spin studio where some folks can burn over 1000 calories in a single class.   A great place to be seen and see some of the more famous faces of the Hamptons (Broderick, Baldwin, Zellwegger… or you know the girl from Jerry Macguire) including instructor Holly Rillinger who is the star of Bravo’s Work Out New York!    Pay by the class or get a membership but no matter what, make sure to book your classes in advance.
2) Yoga Shanti – Sag Harbor located at 32 Bridge Street.  Get toned, fit and sweat at one of the most noted yoga studios around.  There are classes for everyone from beginner to expert. Prices vary and there are some famous faces here too.   One of the more frequent and notable patrons is entrepreneur and producer Russell Simmons. You can pay by the class, package or membership.  It’s a good idea to book your classes in advance here as well. There is also a complete schedule online so check it out.  
By the way, if you’re looking for something a little less “precious,” try Karma Diva in East Hampton.  It’s the yin to Yoga Shanti’s yang.

4) East Hampton Indoor Tennis – East Hampton located at 175 Daniels Hole Rd. – Before you question why I’m suggesting a tennis club let me tell you the average Joe can burn about 700 calories an hour playing tennis.  But if you want something a little more intense check out the tennis aerobics on Tuesday and Thursday mornings at the club.   To say you’ll be dripping wet is an understatement.   Pay by the class or become a member the choice is yours.     The staff is friendly and you can play indoor and out.    Click above or here to go to the website.

5) Crossfit Hamptons– Southampton located at 375 County Rd. 39.  – Rather than me trying to explain it.. watch an eye candy video about what exactly crossfit entails.  A little bit of this a little bit of that and bodies in motion.  Click here for more details on how to sign up for a Crossfit Hamptons class.

Yeah, that looks easy!!!

6) Barry’s Bootcamp – Amaganett located at 199 Main St. and Wainscott 352 Montauk Highway.  – If Xenu started teaching fitness classes… it would be Barry’s Bootcamp. Although it’s the new guy in town it’s already garnered a cult like following.    In all honesty, I’ve never gone but my friends who’ve attended are addicted.   Click here for more details.

7)  Lift Hamptons – Wainscott located at 354 Montauk Highway – A boutique gym located next to the best cookie shop in the Hamptons (Levan Bakery).    I know it seems like some sort of a sick joke but once you pass the temptation you’ll find a motivating bright and zen like atmosphere perfect for your morning workout.   Memberships are based on an hourly rate and include one on one training.    Click here for more information.

8 & 9 ) East Hampton YMCA – 2 Gingerbread Lane and Southampton Town Recreation Center – 1370 Majors Path.   – Both places have it all but at a fraction of the price of the “other” gyms in town. There are no celeb siteings but if you want to live like a local and save some money on getting fit…. click here for Southampton or here for East Hampton YMCA.   Fees vary based on residency in both locations.

10) Truth Training – East Hampton located at 5 Railroad Ave.. – Truth Training is a strength based workout, programming and lifestyle series that revolves around the “foundation” exercises.   Think of it as a P90X class right here live in the Hamptons with some of the best and most educated trainers around.     Click here for class schedules and rates.     

Ok, there it is.. 10 Great places to get your body ready for the beach.    Woah, this blog was exhausting.    Now, it’s time for my burger, fries and beer at the Corner Bar in Sag Harbor!   Just kidding… off to the basement for my Peloton bike.   I don’t want to see any of you losers when I work out!!!   Kidding again…. sort of.

Book Hampton Sag Harbor is Gone and Mostly Forgotten… and a Way to Prevent Serious Accidents in the Hamptons!

The former BookHampton Sag Harbor

Well it was long rumored and now it’s true… Bookhampton in Sag Harbor is now a memory.  I actually just noticed it gone yesterday but sadly it’s been gone for awhile.  Blame it on Kindle or Ibooks but the

fact remains, retail is hard in the Hamptons.     I just wonder how long before all of Main Streets are entirely empty, then I have no doubt some of the villages will have no choice but to allow some of the larger chain stores to move onto the block.

Perhaps the biggest reason I was slow to figure out that there was a retail shuffle in Sag Harbor was due to the fact that I was out of town (the other that I have Netflix on my Ipad and I’m slowly becoming an illiterate slob).    I was on Cape Cod in Provincetown, MA.     Now, while there are many great things about P-twon as it’s called, the restaurants, the beaches and the abundance of really unattractive drag queens, my favorite thing was the amazing bike trails!   The beautifully maintained National Seashore Bike Trails contain miles of challenging and motor vehicle free biking!    They feature views of dunes, forest, ponds and even the ocean and are one of the bigger and popular attractions on “The Cape.”  Now, my question is why don’t we have this in the Hamptons!?!

Imagine bike trails here!!

With more accidents in the Hamptons than ever before, no doubt due to drivers being distracted by their smart phones, the time is now for the east end to create some safe areas for bikers.    This is perhaps the reason why one employee at a local bike shop told me, “anyone who rides after 10 am on a weekend is asking for trouble.”    If you have any doubt about this, go to any of the villages on a weekend.  It’s crowded beyond belief and nobody is watching where they go!   Yeah, I know it’s important stuff they’re doing like checking Facebook or Foursquare or texting about the next Soulcycle class.

So here’s my idea, someone talk to LIPA about a good will gesture that if they execute, I will forgive them the 2 weeks I spent in the dark after Sandy (It was horrible, I had no Netflix).  They take the area under the high tension wires on the East End, you know the ones they refused to bury and pave bike trails underneath.   These things go for miles (look on Google Earth) and a bike trail from Southampton to Montauk could easily be created (IMHO) and hopefully encourage folks to bike to the village instead of taking their Escalades and Hummers.   It’s a win win for everyone!    It might even help alleviate some of the fist fights in the parking lot of those spin studios.  Imagine, bicycling to a spin class!   So how do we get this done?!

OVERHEARD:   While standing in line at the Red Horse Market deli counter in East Hampton.  After ordering a pound and a half of smoked turkey breast the customer asks the employee, “Can you count those, I need to know how many slices I have there!?”   Only in the Hamptons.

Put down the cookie! There’s 40 some odd days till Memorial Day!

You bought the beach pass, you have the Vilebrequin, the Herve Legere and the Birkin.    It’s official you’re ready to hit the beach, as long as you don’t have to pass a mirror first.  Yeah, all of those holiday cookies, turkey, ham, brisket and chocolates have finally taken their toll.    Well have no fear, I’ve done the research for you and if you’re willing to put on your sneakers you’ll be looking like Keira Knightly after a juice cleanse in no time!

It wasn’t that long ago when a new spin studio that I can’t remember it’s name (unless I read one of my old postings) opened and disappeared faster than the free food at a real estate brokers open house.   This time around Westhampton Beach’s CrossFit Hamptons is going into the location.    I stopped by the other day and apparently  classes are already underway.  If you want more details on times and class schedules you can visit their website.   www.cfhamptons.com   If you mention P-11 for some reason they’ll even give you a free week.

Also, some of your old favorites are back and ready for the Summer of ’13.    I’m getting tired so I’m just going to give you the lowdown on some of the more popular places to work up a sweat on the east end.  In no particular order…..
1) SOULCYCLE – 68 Newtown Lane, East Hampton.   The funky spin classes that you can hear on the street are back again for another season.   www.soul-cycle.com
Best Reason to Go – It’s one heck of a workout and the instructors are more like coaches than drill seargents.
Reason Not to Go – Cult like following.  Friends of mine talk about SoulCyle like it’s the Scientology of fitness and that just scares me.
2) FLYWHEEL – 65 Montauk Highway, East Hampton next to the bowling alley.  Also in the Summers at Sag Harbor Gym, 1 Bay Street Sag Harbor.   This is the place with “stadium” bikes where they post your workout on a monitor for all to see.  So if you’re looking for mellow workout this isn’t where you want to go. www.flywheelsports.com
Best Reason to Go – A great work out and some good celebrity spotting at virtually every class.
Reason Not to Go – They post your work out on a monitor and that’s not fun when you’re trying to sweat out the alcohol from the night before!
3) B East – 199 Main Street, Amagansett.   Call it spinning with a twist or an angle.  B East features “core bikes” which actually turn and twist to give you more of a workout.   I have to admit, they’re a little scary at first for the uncoordinated like moi but if you just relax you’ll eventually get the hang of it.   www.eastfit.com
Best Reason to Go –  A more casual and fun atmosphere.  Not everyone there is in Lululemon!
Reason Not to Go – It’s next to Mary’s “friggin” Marvelous!  A workout doesn’t count if you have the amazing tuna salad followed by a coconut cupcake chaser after the class.  Screw the class I’m hungry!
4) Barry’s Bootcamp – 352 Montauk Highway, Wainscott. Now I’ve never been but they have locations everywhere from London to LA.  According to their website “Since 1998, Barry’s Bootcamp has revolutionized group fitness by delivering “The Best Workout in the World” to a legendary following, including many celebrities.”   Their gyms also feature “night club lighting, urban décor.”  Hmmmmmm… I’m not so sure about that last part.    www.barrysbootcamp.com
Best Reason to Go –   Easy parking in the Wainscott shopping center.
Reason Not to Go – It’s a boot camp!!!
Finally, everyone has been talking about those two Wall Street guys that were stupid enough to leave notes trying to cut out the broker after being shown properties out east.   Do you really think this is the first time this has happened?

The biggest dangers in the Hamptons!!!

I’ll start off by saying that I haven’t been as dedicated as I should to my happy little blog but between the job, the indigestion and the house guests (#2 as a direct result of the other two) I haven’t had as much time to sit down and hit the keys! So what’s going on???

Well, I had an interesting conversation last week with a young lady who works in one of those walk in clinics we have here in the Hamptons. You know you’ve seen them and consider them your local town doctor. I’ve actually gone to one of them and to be honest and they saved me one nasty winter cold from becoming pneumonia. Anyway, what did I talk about with this young lady who I’ll call “Coffee” because I want to protect her identity and because I’m typing this in the morning and enjoying a certain beverage. So I asked Coffee about what are the most common types of walk-in’s she sees at the clinic… wait I can’t call her Coffee anymore, let’s call her “Ann”… I’m watching The Today Show. What did she say?????

The biggest problem and health issue for folks in the Hamptons is….. drum roll please… DADADADADADDADDDADADADA…. POISON IVY! Yes, folks the weekend gardeners may have their Martha Stewart gardening kits but they can’t seem to identify this three leafed little gift of itch!! Ann told me she sees it all the time, amateur gardeners covered from head to toe with the cute little rash that makes life miserable. We all know what Poison Ivy looks like now don’t we folks? Well I’ve included a photo of the plant here and leave you with this little ditty I learned as a child, “if it has leaves of three, let them be.” I always follow that rule and it’s kept me safe for years. It also saved me $15 dollars when I went to go see that Batman movie and saw it also starred Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy! Leaves of three I let that movie be!

So what’s number 2!? Well if your thinking it has anything to do with the ocean or beach you’re wrong. The number 2 most dangerous activity in the Hamptons is BICYCLING! No, it’s not peddlers getting hit by vehicles that is causing the problem, it’s lack of coordination and lack of padding and helmets that is causing the problem! Yes, it’s a right of summer when weekend warriors put on their spandex cycling shorts and hit the mean streets of the East End. I know it seems like a good thing to do, be in the great outdoors and exercising but there are a lot of pot holes and gravel out there folks. That seems to be the biggest problem! My advice to you for a safer summer? I have a saying for this too, “If it has wheels of two find one that don’t moo (ve).” Yeah, go to a spin class and go outside on a hike later… and make sure to avoid the poison ivy! But be safe, besides I see the way most people drive out here… It’s not pretty folks! Enjoy the rest of the holiday week!