In case you were sleeping, it’s now August and it’s full throttle here on the East End.   But unlike Summer when I was 12 years old and it lasted forever, the season seems to fly faster and faster.     But before you get to entrenched with sitting on Route 27 for hours on end or waiting an extra 40 minutes at virtually any restaurant for your table, please make sure to remember why you’re out here in the first place.  You’re here to enjoy the beach, the water, the sun and snarking at the overdressed families at Scoop Du Jour on Tuesday nights!   So here are some of my favorite things to do while the sun is still high.  If you do, you might actually thinking spending all of the money to be in the Hamptons was worth it!


A Beach Dinner – While you could use one of the numerous “Claws” or “Clam” companies to caterer your affair… and yes its one heck of a presentation… I prefer to hit Citerella and get some dishes and salads to go.    A big blanket and some nice chilled….errr…errr… “seltzer water” because wine on the beach is not allowed make for a really fantastic evening.  You’ll may also want to wait till after 6 p.m. so that way you can start a nice little beach bonfire and there are some rules for that too (click here) for East Hampton and (here) for Southampton.    But there is nothing more relaxing and memorable then the sound of the surf, the sand and an amazing light show above!  My personal favorite is Wiborg Beach!   The parking lot is small so there aren’t as many other picnickers.

Biking Shelter Island – A few weeks ago I was talking to some local police officers about living in the Hamptons.  One thing they said they would never do during the season is go bicycling!  Yes, the local walk in clinics are making a fortune from cyclists getting clipped by texting busy summer drivers.    Perhaps that’s the reason why I prefer heading to Shelter Island for biking.     In fact, Sag Harbor Cycle Company runs a group ride every Sunday at 7:30 am.  It’s a perfect time to go before the roads get flooded with cars and the gang that runs these things know the safer routes and the roads less traveled.   If you want more information, visit their website and NO TEXTING AND BIKING!

Go Paddeling – It’s about the water people, not about seeing the people that live down the hall from you in the city at spin class!  Its a great work out and think about it, unless you love getting a gamma globulin shot do you really want to fall into the east river?   There are some great companies out here that will rent you kayaks or paddle boards and even give you a lesson.     The calm waters of Shinnecock Bay or Georgica Pond are two local favorites.     If you want more details on who and where, try Main Beach Surf Shop in Wainscott or Adventure PaddleBoards in Southampton.

Take the Dogs to the Beach –  Did I mention that my dogs Bella and Russell love the beach?!  Hmmmmmm…. I’m not sure.  Do your homework and find what times your furry friends are allowed to run the surf!  Also remember to clean up and bring some treats in case they go chasing some delicious piping plover!

Now get off the damn computer and go outside!!!!


Putting some Zen in Your Yogurt…. and Surfing for Surf Stats!


The Hello Kitty Brothel (google the image you’ll understand) in Sag Harbor better known as Yummlicious is getting some new competition.   Located on Main Street in Sag Harbor at the former Well Nest is “Buddha Berry Frozen Yogurt.”   Billing itself as a waffle and coffee bar  the frozen dessert factory features a solid wall full of contemporary and classic flavors from cookies and cream to old fashioned Chocolate chip mint.   There is also plenty gummy bears, chocolate chips and sprinkles to pile on top and put any spoiled Hamptons child into a diabetic shock!   I mean nothing says healthy like frozen yogurt topped with gummy bears and chocolate!   But wait… or should I say weight….  the frozen yogurt is SELF SERVE and they charge you by the weight!!!   This is pure genius that so why mom and dad are busy texting the yoga instructors and trainers, little Veruka and Spalding (after he gets the foot off the boat) can go to town and force their proud parents to pay the tab.      This is like putting free crappy prizes in Frosted Flakes genius!!!     While I can’t say if the yogurts good or bad, I had no patience to have anyone weigh my cookies and cream so you’ll have to go try it yourself.    They also have a zen yogurt garden too!

Trendy surfers form Montauk!
Meanwhile,  I don’t surf and I have no intention to be shark bait anytime in the near future.  But I know plenty of folks that do and its always great running into them on the beach checking the waves. But here’s a question for my friends who enjoy dressing in Neoprene and hopping into the surf; why not just go on line and check out the conditions online Sufline.   Featuring  live web cams from Main Beach and other local surf spots, boarders (do they call themselves that?)  can also get detailed reports on wind, tides and swell conditions.   Now, isn’t that easier than driving all the way to the beach to check on the surf?     OK, now get off your computer and go hang 10.
Get down tonight!   KC and the Sunshine Band!
Ok, now call me cynical but there is an unintentially humorous interview with K.C. of the Sunshine Band fame over on    Now I’m not picking on the poor interviewer who did this one, she probably had no idea who was interviewing.   In a nutshell for those of you who don’t know, they had slew of catchy dance hits in the mid 70’s and had a song on the second album B-side of Saturday Night Fever.  The coffee through the nose moment for me when reading this was, “With so much love for music I wondered why it had been so long since his last album?”   REALLY?  Answer:  Demand… It’s not 1977!!   Now comes the part where I’m nice.   I do have KC and the Sunshine band on my 70’s play list on my I pad and I bet the show this weekend at the Ross School will be an absolute blast with some good retro disco dancing.   If you want tickets to go see one of the “most dynamic front men in music” you can get tickets and information here.    So put on your boogie shoes and get going!  Ewww…. Boogie shoes… gross!

What’s New in the Hamptons Hood ’14… or What Happened While You Spent The Winter with People!

It has nothing to do with Nixon or Kung Fu

While the folks over at Curbed Hamptons talk about all the new restaurants this year, I decided to go a different direction and talk about all the other stuff!     Which calls to mind, I once had a very successful client in my car some time back talking about all things Hamptons.  As we drove by the East Hampton movie theatre he asked me, “Kung Fu Panda’, what’s that about?”   Really?  He wasn’t kidding. Isn’t it obvious that its a morality tale about a poor tailor and his struggle with alcoholism set in pre war Europe! UH… Kidding!  It’s a frigging cartoon about a Panda that knows Kung Fu!   So, that being said, I wonder what they’re going to think when they drive by Panda Diplomacy in Water Mill!   website.  It’ looks pretty cool and I have no doubt it’s what everyone will be wearing at The American Hotel this summer!  Ok, well maybe not there.  The wax museum has it’s own separate dress code.  Well, for those of you that don’t know it’s a surfing apparel, boards and accessories store.   Located at 760 Montauk Highway in Water Mill, better known as the shopping center where there used to be Blockbuster-Citarella-Water Mill Cupcake-Avanti-Subway-Foodies and the soon to be opened West Elm Shopping Center.    If you want more info on surfing pandas, check out the

Citarella has hit Southampton!   While it’s not a “full fledged” supermarket according to sources.   It is no doubt a welcome addition to a town that has the second worst supermarket in the Hamptons Walbaum’s which only comes after Walbaum’s in East Hampton.  The store got approved earlier this
month by the Southampton Village Planning board and quickly settled into their Hampton Street location.   While some locals have voiced their concern over the potential parking problems let me accentuate the positive, THEY HAVE FRESH FOOD!

Another newcomer is located on Main St. in Bridgehampton and it’s called BLOW.  No, it’s not that kind of place!  Get your minds out of the gutter people… this isn’t Nevada!  It’s a hair salon that’s specializing in blow outs for ladies and the occasional puffy haired gentleman about to kick up their heels at the given Hamptons benefit!    If you want more information on getting glamours you can check out their website here!    If you want the other kind you need to get on a plane and head to Vegas or perhaps Amsterdam (ohhhh Amsterdam… more on that later… apparently the Dutch love the Hamptons).

If you’re like me one of the greatest things about living out east is not the surf, the beaches, world class boating, golf or even the lack of good cell phone reception.   It’s the fact we have some of the best damn food anywhere.  One of those that has a reputation of being the best of the best is Tate’s Bakery and now they’re selling their White Chocolate Macadamia cookies among other masterpieces out of the Red Horse Market in East Hampton.  But if you’re worried about your waistline  don’t fret, the cookies are sugar, fat, calorie and dairy free…. NOT… if you have to read the calorie label, move on!   I have not doubt there is like 12 pounds of butter in each cookie but damn, they’re awesome!   They make great chipwiches too… just in case you need more calories!

But if you’re worried about calories and such silliness, fear not Barry’s Bootcamp is opening a new outlet in Amagansett this summer.    Yes, the home of sadistic (IMHO) workouts that burn tons of calories!  According to  the location will feature healthy to go meals from Hu Kitchen.      Great news but I’ll pass on the meals, there’s a coconut cupcake (from Mary’s) with my name on it!  The gym is located at 199 Montauk Highway, right behind Mary’s Marvelous!   Did I mention Mary’s coconut cupcake?  It’s another Hamptons masterpiece and makes a great reward for just doing one of their  before I do one of their infamous 1000 calorie burning classes. UGH!

Finally one more thing new in the Hamptons this summer!  A deadly new tick born disease!  Goody!  I’m not going to bore or kill the mood by writing about it.  If you’re curious let the kill joys at CBS News do it for you here.    In the meantime, i’m going to get some new panda surf clothes and eat my cookies and cupcakes in peace!