Well it’s been at least 6 years or so since The Swamp closed their doors and many across the Hamptons were forced to actually stay at home on Saturday nights. Well now you don’t have to hang with Paris at the Pink Elephant, The Lodge on Race Ln is holding what they’re calling “Saturday Soiree.” While I don’t’ think they’ll be too much dancing, the restaurant is opening up their outdoor patio area and bar for the occasion. I hope they serve those awesome free little hamburger sliders. I’m sure I’ll be one of the few who will actually eat them. Starvation is the new black for ohhh so many in the Hamptons. Anyway, if you need more details… call the lodge directly at 631-324-5022. The invite is to the left. I just hope they don’t do something lame like having stupid drink specials… you know the pink ones with names like the Liza and the Judy! That’s soooo 1989 Provincetown! We’re in the Hamptons damn it!
So, what to wear this Saturday… what to wear!? I can tell you it won’t be anything from
Abercrombie and Fitch. (left, yeah I fit right in!) While many of my friends say I could be a catalog model, it’s not Abercrombie and Fitch…. they’re implying more that I’m that guy in the blue polo shirt grilling the dogs in a Home Depot ad. I would just love to think I have the bod and youthful looks to pull off wearing A&F…. but I DON’T and most men over 35 don’t either. If you’re wearing a hoodie and you’re over 35 YOU HAVE ISSUES. In fact, I’m sure A&F is relieved I don’t wear their clothes. I’m also too old for roller blading, I know that but I may still one day dust off my blades and put on my helmet, wrist guards, knee guards, elbow guards and my ego guards to go for a spin. I make no illusions, I know I’ll look like a freak! I’m also too old to be listening to Timbaland, Anyone from American Idol and Miley Cyrus… Madonna is too old to be doing duets with them! I’ll stay with my Annie Lennox and Sting. Finally, I’m also too old to be hanging out at The Talkhouse in Amagansett. While I did go a few weeks ago to see “The English Beat” and really had a great time, the audience was MY AGE that night. If I go on a normal Saturday night, I skew the medium age by at least a good ten years. I’m over walking on crusty beer soaked floors, although they were fun back in the day. I hate growing up!!!