{"id":1464,"date":"2015-06-11T12:25:00","date_gmt":"2015-06-11T12:25:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/2015\/06\/11\/the-british-are-coming-royal-ones-also\/"},"modified":"2017-02-13T21:16:49","modified_gmt":"2017-02-13T21:16:49","slug":"the-british-are-coming-royal-ones-also","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/the-british-are-coming-royal-ones-also\/","title":{"rendered":"THE BRITISH ARE COMING… THE ROYAL ONES!!!! ALSO, THE POLLEN ISALREADY HERE!"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>\n

The royal formerly known as Prince William, now known as Kate Middleton’s husband is apparently planning to bring his Windsor brood to spend their summer in the Hamptons! \u00a0 I know! \u00a0I know! \u00a0 I’m as excited as the next Anglophile! \u00a0 \u00a0According to the rarely reliable OK magazine, the two have already rented a large estate to rub elbows with the likes of Spielberg and Martha. \u00a0 \u00a0According to palace “sources” they have always wanted to come here so George and Charlotte can “enjoy the sea and the sunshine.” \u00a0 It sounds reasonable to me, so ignore those wet blankets over at Gossip Cop <\/a>that are calling this report complete b*##*#$@! \u00a0 \u00a0 In fact, I have a few suggestions for the royals when they take that leap across the pond. \u00a0 I know\u00a0William will find it here on Hamptons Chatter next time he googles his name in a exhausted or drunken stupor!<\/p>\n

\n\n\n\n\n
<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Calls to Buckingham palace have not been returned!<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Hi William, hopefully you didn’t buy that estate yet and you’ll be calling me as your agent in the near future. \u00a0 Why will you call me? \u00a0Well after you enjoy these five awesome suggestions I have for you when visiting the Hamptons, you’ll know I’m your go to man!<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Cyril’s: \u00a0Will, it’s the best people watching in the Hamptons and the location overlooking scenic route 27 is fit for a King, which you should be next IMHO! \u00a0 Make sure to order\u00a0two BBCs (don’t ask just drink) and Kate will be macking on you like you’re that lead singer guy from One Direction!<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\n

Home Goods: \u00a0 Who doesn’t love a bargain!? \u00a0 You and Kate can stock the estate with fresh linen and towels and even those nifty plastic margarita glasses without paying a kings ransom! \u00a0Not that I hope Charles gets kidnapped and you become King… but if that happens… NO PROBLEMO!\u00a0 You’ll be saving a bundle\u00a0and have the cash as your\u00a0“HOME GOODS HAPPY.”<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n\n\n\n\n
<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
The Essence of cool!<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

The Giant Duck: \u00a0 OK, it’s actually NOT in the Hamptons but it’s a GIANT DUCK! Hello!? \u00a0How cool is that!?<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

Martha Stewart’s House: \u00a0 \u00a0She lives in town and if you give me a call, I’m happy to share her address. \u00a0Just go over, she loves drop by guests! \u00a0 She’ll help Kate use local flowers to make the most amazing table centerpieces and her fresh lemonade is to die for… really! \u00a0 Just go! \u00a0Tell her I said it was OK.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
The American Hotel: \u00a0 A Hamptons institution where you can spot an occasional celebrity and enjoy scenic Sag Harbor. \u00a0Another plus is they now have hooks under the bar for Kate’s purse. \u00a0 \u00a0One final suggestion; I would wait till HRH Elizabeth II comes to town and bring her, she will actually be one of the younger folks at the bar, which will make her feel good. \u00a0 \u00a0You’ll all have a blast!<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Finally, when you come to town Will… can I call you Will?… make sure to bring some good allergy medicine because it is apparently ….”POLLENGEDDON” out here right now! \u00a0 Pools are green, cars are green, windows are green and my poor dog Bella is green… and it’s not easy! \u00a0 \u00a0 So, luckily I have two quick ideas you can follow to help make breathing easier here on the east end. \u00a0 Try small doses of some local honey, apparently it will help you build a resistance to the pollen since the local bees use the same pollen to make the sweet stuff! \u00a0 You can also try showering more frequently, apparently the pollen sticks to your skin and hair more than you realize. \u00a0 So stop breathing all that dead epidermis and pollen and take a shower. \u00a0If all else fails, head to CVS and get some Claritan and make sure to register for the frequent shopper points!<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The royal formerly known as Prince William, now known as Kate Middleton’s husband is apparently planning to bring his Windsor brood to spend their summer in the Hamptons! \u00a0 I know! \u00a0I know! \u00a0 I’m as excited as the next Anglophile! \u00a0 \u00a0According to the rarely reliable OK magazine, the two have already rented a … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":1872,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"rop_custom_images_group":[],"rop_custom_messages_group":[],"rop_publish_now":"initial","rop_publish_now_accounts":[],"rop_publish_now_history":[],"rop_publish_now_status":"pending","generate_page_header":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[1589,1590,1591,1358,1488,1592,1593,1594,1416,1595,1596,1597,1598,1350,1599,1381],"class_list":["post-1464","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-allergies","tag-estate","tag-gossip-cop","tag-hamptons","tag-hamptons-chatter","tag-kate-middleton","tag-martha-stewart","tag-moving","tag-patrick-mclaughlin","tag-pollen","tag-prince-george","tag-prince-william","tag-princess-charlotte","tag-real-estate","tag-royal-family","tag-sag-harbor"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8pfeo-nC","jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/KateWillamHamptons.jpg?fit=236%2C320&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1464","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1464"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1464\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3187,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1464\/revisions\/3187"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1872"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1464"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1464"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1464"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}