{"id":1532,"date":"2013-08-09T18:05:00","date_gmt":"2013-08-09T18:05:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/2013\/08\/09\/the-hamptons-debunking-mythsi\/"},"modified":"2017-02-13T22:45:29","modified_gmt":"2017-02-13T22:45:29","slug":"the-hamptons-debunking-mythsi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/the-hamptons-debunking-mythsi\/","title":{"rendered":"The Hamptons… Debunking the Myths!I"},"content":{"rendered":"

I’ll never forget my first visit to the Hamptons back in the mid 80’s. \u00a0 \u00a0A friend of mine brought me to stay at his parents house which I think was in Southampton. \u00a0 It was somewhat of a culture shock for me. \u00a0 I mean I grew up going to the Jersey shore. \u00a0 \u00a0 Margate, Cape May and Long Beach Island were all I knew of beach living. \u00a0 \u00a0So when I first crossed the canal… Yes, that’s really where the Hamptons begin.. it was a bit of an eyeopener.<\/p>\n

Now that I live out here full-time, friends from near and far have questions about living in our little slice of “heaven.” \u00a0 So along with their requests to visit with friends and friends of friends (I’m sorry, the house is being bug bombed that weekend), come misconceptions about what its really like to be in the Hamptons. \u00a0 So, today I’m here to debunk the myths and misconceptions about life east of the canal. \u00a0Where is Quogue anyway?<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n
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It’s a movie you idiot!!!<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

1) \u00a0Myth: \u00a0If you’re nice to your boss maybe they’ll invite you to their beachfront property for the weekend. \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n

REALITY:<\/b> Hello McFly, “Weekend at Bernie’s” is not real life! \u00a0 You’re not that lucky, your boss isn’t going to invite you and he\/she probably won’t die. \u00a0 So, \u00a0even if you do somehow get an invite it’s going to be exhausting butt kissing and sucking up all weekend! \u00a0 Your boss comes out here to get away… especially\u00a0from you! It’s the truth. \u00a0If they liked you even a little they would have invited you already. \u00a0 \u00a0I don’t care if there was a “Weekend at Bernie’s 2” it’s just not going to happen! \u00a0In fact, if you bumped into them at the Golden Pear they’re going to pretend they never saw you before! \u00a0I experienced that one first hand from Harry C. years ago. \u00a0(I heard he now lives in Michigan and works as an assistant manager at Friendly’s, sometimes Karma works!)<\/p>\n

2) \u00a0Myth: People come to the Hamptons to get mellow, relax and get away from it all.<\/b>
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\n<\/b>
\nREALITY:<\/b> Wait I gotta catch my breath from this one! \u00a0MELLOW!!?? RELAX???! GET AWAY FROM IT ALL? \u00a0 \u00a0 If you’ve ever been to The Palm on a Friday night in the summer you’ll know it isn’t true! \u00a0The overcrowded lobby where everyone dressed in designer duds is aggressive, pushy and jockeying the host stand as if they were starving and getting free government cheese (not as good as it sounds and not kind of bland tasting). \u00a0 Not only that it’s networking central once you get inside the dining room. \u00a0 \u00a0In fact, I was there a few weeks ago with 3 friends and we didn’t even talk to each other. \u00a0 \u00a0They were talking business deals and I was working the room seeing who wanted to sell! \u00a0 \u00a0 I always knew good things would come from the 837 Club!<\/p>\n

3) Myth: There are palm trees in the Hamptons.<\/b>
\n
\n<\/b>
\nREALITY: \u00a0<\/b>They don’t shoot “Revenge” in the Hamptons. \u00a0 \u00a0It’s shot in California or North Carolina or somewhere. \u00a0 \u00a0There are many beautiful trees on the east end, especially Scrub Oak (I’m trying to make them the new “it” thing and improve my property value). \u00a0 Did I say how spectacular Scrub Oak are in the fall. \u00a0They’re beautiful in the summer too. \u00a0Boy I thing Scrub Oak are THE tree of the super wealthy and stylish. \u00a0 \u00a0Call me about seeing my house, it’s on the market. \u00a0By the way, whatever happened to Conrad Grayson?<\/p>\n

4) \u00a0Myth: \u00a0The celebrities in the Hamptons at all of the benefits are refined and super glamorous!\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n\n
<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
The only “Housewife” I want to meet!<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

REALITY: <\/b>I have to quote Marilyn McCoo and Billy Davis Jr., “you don’t have to be a star baby…. to be in our” benefit. \u00a0 I have to blame Andy Cohn for this one. \u00a0 Now, I love you Andy and I’m happy for your success but those housewives are a nightmare! \u00a0 \u00a0I am an addict to the History Channel so I’ve never actually watched a “Real Housewives” of anything. \u00a0 \u00a0 I know plenty of real housewives and personally most of them really aren’t that interesting. \u00a0 So why do I care about Ramona (who screams at waiters)… or Jill (who abuses real agents (moi) about “over priced” houses which I know she couldn’t afford anyway)? \u00a0 \u00a0Besides, you can’t fool me they’re nothing more than Snooky in Pucci dresses. \u00a0 \u00a0Classy! \u00a0 \u00a0Now, don’t get me wrong there are some<\/i>\u00a0real Hollywood type celebrities out here; Alec Baldwin, Kelsey Grammer, Gwyneth Paltrow, Jerry Seinfeld and Christie Brinkley (who I swear uses a stylist to go to Yummylicious) that are well dressed and well behaved. \u00a0 But lately I think they’re keeping a low profile on the benefit circuit. \u00a0I guess they heard that indicted NJ Housewife Teresa is coming to town<\/a>. \u00a0 Although personally, I think I’d kind of get along with that <\/i><\/b>housewife. \u00a0I bet she’s been to Long Beach Island.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’ll never forget my first visit to the Hamptons back in the mid 80’s. \u00a0 \u00a0A friend of mine brought me to stay at his parents house which I think was in Southampton. \u00a0 It was somewhat of a culture shock for me. \u00a0 I mean I grew up going to the Jersey shore. \u00a0 … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":2138,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"rop_custom_images_group":[],"rop_custom_messages_group":[],"rop_publish_now":"initial","rop_publish_now_accounts":[],"rop_publish_now_history":[],"rop_publish_now_status":"pending","generate_page_header":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[2010,2011,1358,1548,2012,2013,1350,2014,1351,2015,2016],"class_list":["post-1532","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-andy-cohen","tag-boss","tag-hamptons","tag-house-guests","tag-housewifes-on-new-york-city","tag-myths","tag-real-estate","tag-reality","tag-rentals","tag-the-palm","tag-weekends"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8pfeo-oI","jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/Weekend-at-Bernies.jpg?fit=320%2C192&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1532","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1532"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1532\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3326,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1532\/revisions\/3326"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2138"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1532"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1532"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamptonschatter.net\/chatter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1532"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}