Buying Ain’t Easy, and Yachting’s Even Harder in the Hot Hamptons

Local real estate is still on fire, according to the Hamptons Q1 Douglas Elliman Report released by Miller Samuel Real Estate Appraisers & Consultants earlier this week. Bottom line: If you think you’ll find a bargain in the Hamptons—think again. Most likely sparked by the ongoing pandemic buying spree and coming summer season, the market pace is not slowing, sales volume is heavy and inventory limited.

Yours truly recently put this East Hampton modern into contract. Going, going, went!

Listing inventory shrunk at its fastest rate in more than 13 years of tracking, and year-over-year sales surged for the third straight quarter to the largest Q1 total in six years. The median sales price hit $1.3 million, rising sharply from $990,000 in Q1 2020, and increasing for the fifth consecutive quarter year over year. While sales surged market-wide, hitting 509 closings as compared to 343 in Q1 2020, activity on the $1 million–$5 million range nearly doubled, skewing the average sales price lower. Listing inventory for the luxury market rose significantly in contrast with the remainder of the market, which declined.

Now might be a great time to sell, but you risk not getting back in, at least not right away.

A Boat Without a Dock

If you thought the housing market was tough… It’s actually harder to find a boat and dockage right now. Getting a slip is never easy as the seasonal throngs make their pilgrimage east and prepare for a summer on the water, especially if you’re seeking a transient spot or accommodating a large vessel.

Mark Cuban’s boat FOUNTAINHEAD off the coast of Sag Harbor 2020. If you have to ask you can’t afford it.

Star Island in Montauk is basically full for the summer, whether you’ve got a 20-foot Bertram or a multi-million-dollar 100-footer, but overnights are still possible on a “hit-and-miss” basis. For less-fancy folk, Montauk Marine Basin actually has some open slips, but don’t expect to find a lot of popped collars and sweater-over-the-shoulder types among these local fishermen and salty sea dogs.

In fact I’ve been told by a boathing buddy that Strong’s Marine, with multiple locations around the East End, has limitied inventory. I also found out that Mill Creek in Noyac only has dry storage, though they’ll drop your boat in the water after you call, if you don’t mind waiting.

In East Hampton, Seacoast Enterprises Associates (SEA)—owners of Three Mile Harbor, Halsey’s, Gardiner’s and Harbor marinas say they’re “uber busy across all four marinas.” SEA’s business has been ramping up since Covid hit and two other local marinas sold, adding to the already healthy annual demand.

What does it all mean? If you’re only just beginning your necessary searches to live the East End boating life, and you want to hobnob with the yachting elite, you may have to settle for a kayak or a 3 hour tour (which I strongly suggest you pack a steamer trunk because you never know). Clearly, summer 2021 is all about planning. Nothing is going to be easy without some forethought.

7 RANDOM THOUGHTS ABOUT THE HAMPTONS SUMMER ’16!

One of the fun things about writing this blog is the fact it’s a blog.     This isn’t done for any other reason than my own amusement.   I can write thoughts and impressions on just about everything, except relatives.   That being said, today I’m just jotting some really tangential thoughts about living on the east end.   In no particular order of importance are my unrelated musings about my little part of the world this summer.

Life in the fast lane…….

1)  Do they really need speed traps on Route 27 when the average speed on weekends is about 10 miles an hour?     Seriously, I’ve noticed this over and over again.   Considering traffic is worse this year than last (yes, we say this every year) I don’t understand.    Maybe there* not actually speed
traps and instead just looking for the next Range Rover to go by with an inexperienced driver texting like mad on the way to Tracy Anderson.   Speaking of which….

2)  Wouldn’t it be great if they opened a Planet Fitness next to Tracy Anderson in Water Mill!?    I don’t know why but I just find this idea so appealing.   Come to think of it, let’s open a Ben and Jerry’s on the other side.

3)  I’m over screaming children in restaurants…. when I was a kid, my parents would have killed (me) if I ran around and screamed in a public space.   But then again,  the only two restaurants my parents ever took me to were Rustler Steak House and Perkins Pancakes.   Anyway, we digress.   The bottom line is I’m not spending top dollar to eat out and have your kid scream in my ear!  When my nieces and nephews were little and screaming, I wouldn’t go to do dinner with them so I’m sure as hell not having dinner with your kid!  I know I sound cranky but whatever.    I also want to say your kid isn’t that cute!

4)  There is nothing better than taking a boat at twilight and heading to dinner.   Especially when it’s someone else’s boat!!!

5)  Is it really worth $100 for a pound of Lobster Salad?

Season’s Greetings… it could be July 4th!

6) If you’re being honored by a particular charity and asked to make a speech, please make it about the charity and not about yourself.  “I’m so busy but I find time… my personal assistant has been swamped…. my new shoes hur!”  UGH! Really?   Hamptons residents are very generous and love supporting the charities of their choice and…. squirrel… make sure to buy tickets for Gimme Shelter Animal Rescue benefit next week it’s a good one… also the LGBT Network’s Sunset on the Harbor….. but please don’t mistake my donation as an invitation to go on about YOU!

7) Finally,  I was taught long ago you never go to someone’s house for dinner empty handed.    I think it’s a nice practice.   But for the love of g-d, if you’re going to re-gift the bottle of wine you received two weeks earlier at your dinner party take the old tag off.     Oh, and by the way if I’m the one who brings said bottle back to your house, please don’t let everyone know!   Maybe I didn’t like that cheap garbage you gave me!!!

*yeah I know it should be they’re… I’m just getting even with the grammar police!