Southfork Kitchen

The weird and wonderful world of Hamptons Real Estate!!! Part 1,324,9897… and some potentially grate I mean GREAT news for Southfork Kitchen!

It boggles my mind sometimes how people think the Hamptons market works and what the agents actually do out here.   The following tales have no particular theme, thread or commonality other than they both make me scratch my head with a big WTF?!    The first hilarious tale I have this week involves an e-mail I received earlier this week.  I think it’s kind of a perennial here on the east end and I call it….

Fast Times and Hamptons High!

Here’s what it said: 
Hey my friends and I are having trouble finding a house available for rent for the weekend of the 20th to 22nd of June and were wondering if you had any eligible houses. It would be around 40 people for two nights. You can reach me at (516) 996-xxxx!

 

Ok, 40 people for 2 nights at the end of June?  Now, I’m not exactly a rocket scientist but something tells me this is a graduation party.   Besides, does anyone really want to stay in a house for two days with 40 people.   I can barely stand when there’s more than 4 in my house and I have plenty of space.    Also there is the part about, “my friends and I are having trouble finding a house.”  REALLY!?!?!?  I’m shocked, doesn’t everyone want 40 people to rent their house for 2 days!?  What could go wrong? By the way, I really wanted to correct the grammatical errors and send it back to the sender, “are you really sure you’re ready to graduate?”

Bad Ideas… 40 people for a two day rental!


War of the Roses – Hamptons Style
A while back I was handling the sale of a property where the owners were going through …. shall I say… a bitter and nasty divorce.   To give you some idea, if they had a baby Solomon would’ve had to cut the kid in two.  There was no middle ground!   But wait, it gets better they were living in the house together until it sold!!!   Yep, it was fun.   Well, one day, we had scheduled an open house and I spoke to the husband and left the wife a message.     I assumed all was well until I arrived and found the wife’s boyfriend parading around the house naked.   As I was putting out my wrap sandwiches for the fellow brokers and prospective buyers said boyfriend informed me “I fell off my bike and scraped my butt, so I can’t wear any pants.”  Hmmmm.   What about a blanket?  Nope, that won’t do it either, the fabric would be irritating.     Can you go into a room and I’ll keep people out of that one?  Sure, that sounds liek a good idea.  Well despite my best warnings a neighbor who was “curious” didn’t listen to me and went into the room!   OMG…SCREEECH!   If only I had foresight to sell tickets!!

Therapy and Miscellaneous Sightings!  
Your broker knows more about you than you think.   Especially if you’re the type that likes to leave everything out in the open.     Some of the things I’ve come across  (I don’t particularly like this part of the job) range from the weird to the gross and the down right crazy.   Now, some were former listings of mine and some were left in the open of houses I have shown for rent and for sale.    Once agin here are some of the wackiest things, in no particular order: condoms new and used (ewwwww), humongous bongs, the book “Toxic Parents,” weird porn dvd’s,  half eaten sandwiches with 3″of mold, phallic toys, lice shampoo (ewwwwwwwwww again),  self portraits on velvet, labeled urns with an entire family on the fireplace mantel, court appearance notices and my personal favorite a geek shrine to C3P0 and R2D2 (literally A SHRINE!).    I really can’t make this stuff up.

 

Southfork Kitchen

Finally a little bit of news that’s a tad more normal.   A change of hands at the Southfork Kitchen in Bridgehampton.    A recent press release announced,  “Glad you made it through the winter of 2013, Southfork Kitchen did not.  We have passed the torch to the next chef, Todd Jacobs who will continue with local, season and sustainable cuisine.  We thank you for your patronage….”  I’m not sure if he’s the same Todd Jacobs but if he is the one I found in Google.. it sounds promising.  According to his bio of Atlantica Restaurant in Long Beach, “Todd Jacobs, chef/owner of Tierra Mar and Atlantica is a graducate of the French Culinary Institute in Manhattan.  He spent six years running the kitchen at the American Hotel which received the Di Rona Award while he was there.”   Sorry Southfork Kitchen but I found your menu, expensive odd and pretentious.   Here’s hoping for new and better things!

Sothfork Kitchen is open and it was worth the wait!

So after months of false starts and opening dates that have come and gone, Southfork Kitchen in Bridgehampton is finally open. The big question is now, was it worth the wait?! The answer is a definitive yes. Southfork Kitchen is billed as a sustainable “farm-to-table” restaurant with seafood and local produce, and boasting it’s very own on-site gardens.

Chef Joe Isidori has has created a menu that is both innovative and delicious. Some of the featured appetizers on the menu include 8 o’clock Ranch Pork Belly with breakfast radish, sea salt and Yazu, Southfork Kitchen Clam Chowder with soy cured bacon and vegtables and a amazing Garden salad with homemade buttermilk dressing and ewe’s blue cheese.

Entrees include Icelandic Artic Char with white organic miso and tonato fondue, Milowski Farm Hertiage Turkey Saltimbocca with egg, orgainic spinach and guanciale. I’m not a food writer here so I’m just copying what the menu says. So don’t ask me what guacnciale is!? I actually ordered the Chicken… yes, chicken.. but I have to say it was really quite good. Ok, I’ll be more adventurous next time.

The wines were local as well featuring Channing Daughters and Wolffer vineyards for example. All in all it was a great evening, with a few little kinks in the service but it IS A NEW PLACE! Owner and blogger Bruce Buschel has created a warm and friendly enviornment where his greetings of many of the diners will no doubt make Southfork Kitchen the hardest reservation in the summer of ‘011! Wow, I was nice… no complaints.. but I have to say SFK earned it. Good luck guys!

Southfork Kitchen is open at 203 Sag Harbor Turnpike, Bridgehampton, NY 11932

Call (631) 537-4700 for hours.

More Hamptons business obituaries and Water Mill’s new sweet spot!

So, if you read the blog recently you know that Citarella Water Mill is gone, Saks Fifth Avenue in Southampton is gone and one of my favorites Tutto Italiano shuttered up last week with no notice leaving some residents and a dozen employees miffed and angry. Read more here: http://bit.ly/9JacMv Well now you can add Ziggy’s in Bridgehampton to the list. The restaurant which catered to families and served a pretty good burger (hello maybe they could sell the recipe to Bay Burger) is becoming something called “M&E CONTEMPORARY TAPAS”. I don’t know who is running this or doing it but let me just say, does the Hamptons really need a SECOND tapas place?! I like Copa on School St. in Bridgehampton. In fact, I ate there last night and the flat bread pizza with chicken was over the top great! I have no idea who is opening the new place M&E but once I get the dope, I’ll write asap! I don’t have anything against tapas but there are a million other cuisines out there that we could use out east. My biggest beef is a decent Mexican!

Meanwhile, NY TIMES blogger Bruce Buchel has finally opened his long awaited Southfork Kitchen on the Bridge-Sag Turnpike in Bridgehampton. According to the blogger, the first night went off without a hitch or any major catastrophes. http://nyti.ms/au74FJ Meanwhile, I heard via a friend of a friend that the food was worth the wait. No comments about the service though. Really… they didn’t mention the service. It could have been great! Who knows!?

Finally, something we do need in the Hamptons… CUPCAKES! Enough about Magnolia, Cupcake Cafe and Crumbs we now have THE WATERMILL CUPCAKE COMPANY. Run by two cousins from the city Ruth Balletta and her cousin Cindy have brought a welcome confection to the East End! Located at the Blockbuster/former Citarella/Muse shopping center in Water Mill the girls have baked up some great stuff. My personal favorite was the “red velvet” which are the real McCoy with dark coco and not just food coloring. The cakes were fresh and buttery and the brokers at my recent open house where I dispensed these cakes, gave them an A+! The Water Mill Cupcake Company is opened at 10 am til 5pm. The coffee was pretty awesome too. Great job ladies! 631-726-044 is the number!