summer rentals

Restaurant Shuffle

I’m sorry I’ve been MIA the past few weeks. I was traveling and things got busy. But I’m back and I’m ready to roll!!! Speaking of roll and or rolls… sushi rolls that is!

Bamboo is gone and Shiki has arrived. Sushi is great, prices are about the same but the interior is a little sleeker and clean. They don’t have a liquor license just yet so BYOB, but that should be fixed soon and once it is Thursday Free Sushi Night will return! Posted via email from pjmhamptons’s posterous

Also if you’re curious about Shiki, they’re a restaurant from “up island” as we like to say. One is in Babylon and the other in Smithtown. It’s gotten pretty good reviews in Zagat’s and the food has been called ““fresh”, “tasty”, “expertly prepared” sushi and “outrageous rolls” as well as “unusual hot dishes” in “large portions”, its “reliability” and “great deals” continue to lure “locals.”

I thought my two dinners there were pretty terrific. So rest easy East Hampton, you don’t have to go too far for good sushi. I’ll see you again at Shiki! Here’s the web site for the restaurant:

http://shiki-longisland.com/

Tales from the Trenches… the renters and landlords from HELL!!! YES, they are true!!!

In case you weren’t aware, August 1st is High Noon in the Hamptons for real estate agents. WHY? Because it’s the day most of the rental customers move in for their end of the summer rentals. While real estate agents make more than say the girl at the Carvel, when people are paying some serious bucks the expectations are a little different. So, I did a little informal polling around town with home owners and a few agents from Prudential, Corcoran and the other guys and asked what are some of your favorite stories from the trenches. Here are a few of my personal favorites. The names have been changed to protect the stupid and innocent!

A TOAST TO THE BROKER: Friends of mine decided to rent their own home south of the highway for August and spend the month in Europe. They were relieved when they found a wealthy couple from out of state who would actually be moving in with their maid, butler and entire staff to look after their very pristine home. Well while their home was for the most part pristine the kitchen had issues. The issue? The toaster was sub par and required more than one cycle to get the bread golden brown. The irate renters insisted said landlords immediately get a new toaster that morning while they were “still having breakfast!” The landlord’s response was “Krups you!”

HALSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM: This comes from an agent who’s customers “The Smiths” have a bad short term memory and won’t settle for second best. Due to an influx of arriving renters and scheduling conflicts the agent “Halston” was unable to meet Mr & Mrs. Smith to let them in to their new August rental. No problem. They’ve been to the house before and Halston would leave them a key under the mat and meet them later to make sure everything is alright. Well the Smiths arrived and loved the house! “Halston, dont’ bother we’re fine… we’ll speak to you later if we have a problem!” Well two days later, “Halston we have a problem!” The Smiths were awoken early in the morning by the owners of the house! The homeowners were shocked to find someone sleeping in their beds! “Who are you people” the owners exclaimed!?” The Smiths were indignant and shocked, “we’re the people who rented this house!” There was only one problem, The Smith’s didn’t rent the house they rented the one next door!

GLEN OR GLENDA: What is an agent to do when he or she rents a home to someone who isn’t what they appear?! One broker went to the home at the owners request to find out who was the extra woman staying in their house?! They had rented it to a single gentleman who seemed to have shacked up and allowed a woman to move in without the landlords consent. Well imagine the surprise that nobody new had moved in. It was just a matter of the the tenants preference to wear heels and skirts while vacationing in the Hamptons. As if they’re weren’t already enough single women in the Hamptons!!!?

Finally a few quickie requests and complaints that agents have received over the past few years;

1) There is no hot water in the master shower… both knobs say cold!!
2) Can you help us change the light bulb in the night stand lamp, we’re not very mechanical!?
3) There are too many bugs in the back yard and there is no screened in porch, you need to do something!
4) Would the landlord mind cutting down the one tree? It’s blocking the late afternoon sun from the pool!
5) How would running the pool heater drain the propane tanks??!

Oh people, there are way more stories here to discuss. Perhaps I’ll have more in the days to come! But now you know why I haven’t blogged and what I’ve been dealing with!!!

Finally, to those folks that have that top agent representing their property. If they’re too busy to let another agent preview a $39 million dollar home, do you think they’re wasting their time showing your cheap $10 million dollar shack?! Any guesses who this broker is?

Who said the crowds are mellow and fun loving during the summer???!

Yep this is a real video featuring my cousin in law Jordan Goldman. Who thought a silly little toy could provoke such hostility!? Hey, I guess everyone has their own issues!!!

Meanwhile, I was busy busy busy! But saw some great stuff at the East Hampton Fine Arts Festival. If you have some time, It’s at the American Legion of East Hampton on Montauk Highway in Amagansett from 10a to 6p. I know it’s not everyones cup of tea but if you can go with an open mind, it’s a nice hour of activity.

Finally, I’ve never seen Blondie live but I heard they’re awesome. Anyway, I just got front row seats for their performance at Westhampton Beach Performing Arts Center. They still have more tickets available at http://whbpac.org , the performance is Sunday September 5Th. If you think that Blondie doesn’t have it anymore take a look at this video from their album about 3 years ago.

Change, Change, Change…. or maybe not and your friend who got a $40,000 oceanfront rental is lying!

I keep hearing everyone talk about how “The Hamptons have changed so much over the past few years.” Well, I beg to differ. I’ve compiled a list of things that are still the same out east. And remember as Carly Simon sang, “these are the good old days.”

The best steak place in town is still The Palm.

Sushi is still free Thursday nights at Bamboo.

The bagels at Hampton Bagels on North Main are still the best.

The staff at Bagel Buoy in Sag Harbor is still nasty.

The American Hotel still has a great Saturday night bar crowd.

The lines at Walbaums in East Hampton are still way too long.

Friday night at Almond is still a bad place for DWF’s to meet SWM’s but hey, it’s still fun!

Howie at Paradise is still the best bar tender.

Driving out on Friday night to the Hamptons can still take almost as much time as flying from NY to LA. Thank god we know Howie!

I’ll still have to wait in line to get into Georgica.

There are still no $40,000 oceanfront summer rentals in Bridgehampton despite what your friend’s friend is saying.

The East Hampton police still hit the beach at 9:01a on weekends to ticket dog owners.

You still need a mortgage to get a lunch at the Golden Pear.

And finally… the donuts at Scoop Du Jour are still just as good as when they were Dresen’s.

So stop your belly aching folks and just enjoy the summer!!!

Finally… If you read this blog than you know about Russell my new terrorist… I mean dog. Anyway, he’s here thanks to the folks at Last Chance Animal Rescue Fund of the Hamptons. Russell is also a big martini drinker so it only makes sense that he and I attend the first annual “Martini’s for Mutts” to benefit the Last Chance Animal Rescue Fund, on Saturday, Aug. 29, from 5 p.m to 8 p.m. Yeah, I’m giving you plenty of advance notice.

Enjoy an evening of poolside cocktails to benefit this most worthy cause at the home of Edward Montak and Michelle Neufeld, at 214 Toppings Path in Sagaponack.

Last Chance Animal Rescue Fund is a charitable, not-for-profit organization, created to save the lives of animals. The organization states “We rescue animals that are located in “KILL” facilities and underwrite the costs of relocating them to “NO KILL” facilities in hopes of finding them a forever family. The minimum donation is $30. RSVP at neufeld.michelle@gmail.com.

http://www.lcarf.org/about.php

Also, look for last years weekly afternoon tea dance to be relocated to Bamboo in East Hampton. Details to come…