IN CRUST WE TRUST… ASIAN WITH A FRENCH TWIST… PLUS THE BROVENTURE THAT BIT THE DUST.

Looks like East Hampton is leaning in hard to its new identity as “Little Little Italy.” The once-rotating door of restaurants at the old Laundry/Lodge/Leif Hope’s/Race Lane/Botero space is getting yet another tenant—this time, it’s Rubirosa (or as we’re calling it, Rubirosa for the season), the legendary red-sauce-slinging shrine from NYC’s Little Italy. Yes, the Staten Island pizza dynasty behind Joe & Pat’s is bringing their vodka pie dreams out east in a summer pop-up that’s sure to leave carb-loving locals sauced. With East Hampton already feeling like an Italian food group chat—Città Nuova, Serafina, Crazy Pizza, Sant Ambroeus (close enough), Sam’s, and La Campanina—we’re officially at risk of a marinara monopoly. But we’ll allow it, especially if the chicken parm is as gooey as the gossip at Nick & Toni’s. Get ready for vodka pies that could convert a keto warrior, and enough mozzarella to clog Montauk Highway. One thing’s for sure: this town isn’t running out of thyme—it’s running out of thyme to digest all this Italian food. Sorry.

Those of us who were annoyed beyond belief last year by the pretentious “NAOA Life Club” on Buckskill Road in East Hampton can breathe easier. If you recall, a couple of bros from the city rebranded the old Hampton Racquet Club as a wellness club with a reputedly $30,000 membership fee. $30K for wellness? As Fred Sanford would say, “I’m coming, Elizabeth!” Applications also had to include links to social media and a photograph. Of course, NO NERDY, OLD OR UNATTRACTIVE FOLKS. Anyway, thank goodness, that venture failed and Hampton Racquet is back with a fairly sensible $3K individual membership and some fancy new upgrades thanks in part to NOAA or NAOA OR NOAH. Whatever! Anywho, also back is the amazing Thai food of the former V Cafe with a new French/Asian fusion twist. Now called Suongs Cafe, it will likely be one of my go-to spots this summer… so sing a SUONG.


And remember all that brew-ha-ha last year about the Hedges Inn (everyone’s favorite drive through hotel). possibly turning into yet another exclusive members’ nightlife club? That also failed. (Toteboard so far: Hamptons 2, City Bros 0.). Andrew and Sarah Wetenhall, who transformed the Colony Hotel in Palm Beach, are taking on the Hedges Inn, founded in 1873 by Isabella Hedges (who by the way was also one of the founders of LVIS). Guests of the 13-room inn can choose from some pretty luxe amenities, including Ahab, the inn’s “texting concierge service”. Supposedly,  “whether guests are after a last-minute dinner reservation, additional pillows, the best beach for golden hour, or just a clever one-liner, Ahab is always just a text away.” Excuse me a second, folks! I need to text for a clever comeback.


Also available is a “personalized beach setup service,” “curated beachside refreshments,” and a “bespoke bike program.” Thank god the bikes have spokes! Anyone else tempted to check in and see if they have palanquin service to Main Beach? Just me? The new restaurant is called Swifty’s, because nothing says “Hamptons” like a restaurant named for a famous Hollywood agent who lived permanently in L.A. Noteworthy dishes include Swifty’s crushed avocado with espelette (nope, me neither), agave house chips, pico de gallo, and Yami’s salsa. The menu also features jumbo Maryland crab cakes, chicken curry salad, chilled lobster salad with green goddess dressing, and chicken paillard with lemon, arugula, and shaved parmesan. On top of all this they’ll be hosting their (local Paul Johnson who is famous) apparently “famous” trivia night every Sunday from 5-6:30.

Paws, Sauce & Applause: Hamptons Heats Up with Two New Pizza Joints and a Doggone Fabulous Pageant

Well, pour one out for Kizzy-T’s—our beloved little East Hampton haunt that managed to serve charm and chow without the side of theatrics. Taking its place? None other than Crazy Pizza, (click here to learn about Crazy Pizza) the flashy import from SoHo, where apparently pizza needs to be served with a show and a manifesto. According to their website, they’re bringing “an Italian oasis” to our quaint village, because what East Hampton really needed was more imported vibes and fewer local gems. While they wax poetic about “bold new flavors” and “elevated culinary visions,” we’re just hoping they don’t charge $45 for a margherita and a round of interpretive dance. Stay tuned, folks—it’s pizza, but make it drama. BTW, friends in the city have given Crazy Pizza some major thumbs up.


As you remember (you do, right?) we have two beloved pups. Bella, a black mixed breed who is now getting on to “dowager” status, and Ralphie, an incredibly dignified beagle. And by “dignified,” I mean “not really.” And not ready for dog shows. Dog agility? Ralphie jumps like a sack of potatoes. Obedience? Ah hahahaha, he’s a beagle. Of course, he is the cutest and bestest boy there is, but it’s hard to tell from a photograph.

Which is why I’m unsure whether we’ll be entering the Inaugural Baron’s Cove Doggie Pageant. Sure, Bella would have Evening Wear locked up, or would have if Chanel Chien hadn’t closed up shop, and Ralphie would win the Swimsuit competition rocking a tiny pair of Vilebrequin trunks, but I don’t want to make my dogs feel as if their only value is their looks.

Of course it’s all for a good cause–Southampton Animal Shelter Foundation. If you can’t make the pageant in person on May 18, ESPN will surely be streaming it later. Click here for more details.

Finally one more bit of pizza news. Pizza Pizza is now part of Cluckman’s on Water Street in Sag Harbor. If you’re looking for a quick slice on the go… this is your spot. It’s good and hearty pizza with an eclectic and large selection of slices. The safe is also friendly and attentive. So give it a try and let me know what you think!

< Cluckman’s Pizza!