I’m still reeling from the coal in my stocking this holiday season.    I mean I’m not poor, poor, pitiful me but I was hoping for a brand new shiny MacBook so I could bring you  more Hamptons Chatter!    But enough complaining!   Because the optimist that I am, my gaze is now turning toward the new year!    So what will it take to make me truly happy…. other than a good script of Zoloft?   Wait no further, here are my wishes for not only me but everyone in the Hamptons.    Remember, a few years ago I wished for a few  more good Mexican restaurants and now we have two (Coche Comedor and K Pasa).

Domino’s Pizza or Little Caesars – Since Phoenix restaurant in Wainscott closed the home delivery thing in the Hamptons sucks.    I grew up in suburbia and although we didn’t have Ubereats or anything of a sort, we at least had pizza delivery!!    While I know the above pizza companies aren’t exactly gourmet, they deliver!   I’m not picky, I’m just lazy.

More Cell Towers – A few years ago, I wrote a blog about all the dead zones out east (click here)   Well not much has changed in the 6  years since I wrote that piece.    If you don’t believe me how bad it is on the East End, download the Open Signal app.   It will

A VERY CRUDE MAP;  A is an ATT dead zone.  V is Verizon dead zone.

show you how bad it actually gets.    The one thing that has changed is that more folks are abandoning landlines for cell service only.     Where a few years ago, cell phones were a luxury they are now necessity.    The fact the Hamptons have such limited service is not only dangerous it’s irresponsible.  UPDATE:   It looks as if something is happening soon… for ATT users !!!  CLICK HERE

An Upgraded Movie Theater – I love going to the movies.   The popcorn, the shared experience and the amazing real estate commercial before the film even starts are all part of a great evening.    But lately, I’m having CINEMA ENVY.    Social media posts by all of those snowbirds in Florida flaunting reclining chairs and big glasses of Chardonnay while watching Star Wars have me wanting that experience here.

Cool Temps & Red Hot Deal

I know most folks would pay more just to avoid having the seat where your legs are in your mouth and a spring is puncturing your back.

Well enough wishing and complaining for now anyway.    If you’re looking for something good to do this time of year and I know the options are limited… I’m going to start talking about some of the great prix fixes going on right now.   My first choice right now is Tutto Il Giorno in Southampton and Sag Harbor.   On Thursday and Sunday’s they’re offering a 3 course dinner and two glasses of wine for 2 at $59.00 (not including tip).   Considering that’s the price of a single entree at some places, this is a great deal.   Not only that the food is off the hook but not exactly low calorie.    I will also say, this place has some of the best atmosphere of any eatery on the East End.    Well that’s it for me this time around.. MANGIA!








Can you hear me now??! Plus, Patrons see Red at Stix!

A few weeks ago I had the pleasure of being invited to a friend’s wedding in Montauk.    It really was a beautiful reception but the reception at the reception was terrible!   But hey anyone who has spent more than one day in the Hamptons can tell you that.   Its not that I was being rude or doing work but I was trying to upload photos to the old FB and it was a cellular wasteland!  Ironically, after noticing a black fly in my chardonnay, I realized I just got back from a trip to Ireland where in the middle of nothing but sheep and pubs there were at least 3 bars and 4 pubs at all time!   It was a great trip!
So where in the Hamptons are the dead zones?  Well I started taking note and I’m here to share.   So if you’re driving or hanging out east and your boss calls you, if you study my map you can say for example, “I’m driving on Scuttle Hole Road and I’m about to lose you,”  even if you’re in East Hampton Village.   I have ATT and the dead areas are noted by the “A”… Verizon is noted by the “V” and came after consulting a friend.   Just remember, this is just from OUR experience and maybe our  I phones are at fault.  We don’t want no trouble from anyone!
V is Verizon dead zone, A is ATT!


The crowd at Red Stix!

Meanwhile, as we stand on the verge of getting another Asian restaurant in the Hamptons (see yesterday’s blog which Curbed already wrote about) the news about the latest entry is mixed at best.   Last week I stopped by with some friends at the very expensive and very crowded Red Stix.  While I can tell you they’re doing gang busters, there were a few frustrated patrons who decided an hour and a half was too long to wait for their stir fry!   The table next to us high tailed it out of there after waiting, while we stuck it out.   Suffice to say, the food was good…. actually very good.  But if you’re going to charge those prices you better get the food out on time!  That’s just my opinion.


The Hottest Hamptons Housewarming Gift…. plus a quick Summer 2014 Rental Guide… AND LINKS TO GET YOUR BEACH PASSES !

The best house warming in the Hamptons!

One thing new comers will discover when they come here is the cell phone service out here is the pits.    I’ve had both AT&T and Verizon and I don’t care what their ads say, both their coverage out here stinks!    From Noyac Rd. to Scuttle Hole Rd to Sagaponack South to the Northwest Woods, getting even one bar from any service is wishful thinking!   Hello, can you hear me now????  NO!    Although this particular condition is particularly handy when listening to boring conversations from friends discussing their latest posting on face book.  “I’m sorry, the signal out here is terrible.”

This is the reason that one of the hottest house warming gifts on the east end, from this agent at least (and a few other smart agents)  is a “micro cell tower.” I live in East Hampton outside the village and I was long been frustrated by getting 10 voice messages every time I left my house.   But no more! I fixed that by getting the AT&T 3G MircoCell.   Now in my house I get about 5 bars, where before I got zippo!   The cost was about $150 from AT&T or you can do a quick search on E-bay where you can get them for as little as $99.    I’ve given several away to friends and customers and it was a hit and for a few a life saver (well not literally maybe more of a social life saver).   I’ve heard stories about the providers sending the towers for free if you bitch badly enough, but I hate groveling and I’d rather just pay the money and move on!   If you need more details, call your provider and ask them, “can you hear me now?”

This coming weekend for many real estate agents on the east end marks the beginning of the traditional summer rental season.   While summer rentals can start as early as the prior year, most Hampton visitors tend to look east beginning President’s Day Weekend.    Well before you trek out here, let me remind everyone that renting out east is a bit different from renting an extended hotel room.      For 3 months a year at least, you pretty much own a house.    Also, unless you’re ready to shell out a big hunk of change, odds are you’ll be driving your car to the beach rather than walking.     So before you pile everyone into that Plymouth Duster you better make sure you have a parking permit sticker!     Last year, I posted a quick video on the “Ask Elliman” site, to give a good overall introduction to spending their summer at the beach.   I’m posting it again to remind everyone… that along with the links for east town’s permit website.   So you can get the ball rolling for Summer ’14 in the comfort of your own home.


East Hampton Village Beach Permits
East Hampton Town Beaches
Southampton Town Beaches
Southampton Village Beach Permits


2012 Hamptons… a year in P.U.review …. The worst of the worst!

Have after. To what issue will this

Something is rotten in the state of
Well Shakespeare could have been writing about the Hamptons in the year 2012.   Luckily there was no Mayan Apocalypse – much to the disappointment of the  History Channel – so it really wasn’t all that bad – but there were a few flops and misfortunate incidents that are worth mentioning.    Here they are in no particular order;

Hurricane Sandy, trouble in the end.

The LIPA response to Hurricane Sandy – Sure it was fun for the first night but when it came time to empty my refrigerator the fun had worn off… and I don’t think candlelight is much fun anymore after using it non-stop for two weeks.  Listen we know it was tough but at least give us some idea of when you think we’ll be back on the grid.  This way we make decisions as to where and how we are going to eat, live and watch Revenge on Netflix!

They look so friendly!

The Mitt Romney Fundraiser – So Ron Perleman decided to throw a little party for his friends and low and behold it turned into mass chaos with rumors of cheap booze, man on man kissing, water boarding and worst of all no Chex Mix! In case you don’t remember what happened, click here for a little recap. Now, I happen to have some inside scoop on the whole situation. Apparently it was all some big misunderstanding. The said protesters/crashers were actually just hoping to borrow some Grey Poupon. How embarrassing! I guess uber-rich people aren’t really as friendly as they appear in mustard commercials.

The Whole Foods Pop Up Store – What happens everyone waits with baited breathe for arguably one of the best stores around to open up in the Hamptons. Well if it was the Whole foods in Wainscott they will stay away in droves. Now, how did that happen!?!? Well, If you want my two cents… and apparently you do… I can sum it up in two words. SOVIET SUPERMARKET… there was nothing on the shelves and what little there was had a hefty price tag. Now, I love Whole Foods in the city but I’m not going to make a special trip to Wainscott just to buy their store brand of Cheerios! Hello! WHOLE FOODS, IF YOU’RE GOING TO DO IT… DO IT RIGHT! By the way, we love you, please come back and try again!?


Curbed Hamptons

The Yummylicious sign – sure the frozen treats may be yummy but the sign itself made the town of Sag Harbor look scummy!   Imagine if the makers of Hello Kitty decided to open up a brothel in the middle of the village.   Think about it!   You get the picture!  A few years ago they held fundraisers to preserve the Sag Harbor Cinema sign, now they need a fundraiser to buy Yummylicious a new sign.  Come to think of it, the name of that place bothers me too!

ATT Hamptons Cell Service –  NO!  I did not hang up on you I was just driving through Sagaponack…. or at my house…. or on the beach…. or in the Northwest woods…. or on Noyac Road… or… oh enough.    I don’t know if Verizon is any better but I’m getting tired of paying for an I phone that I primarily use as an Ipod!   But you know the good thing is I called ATT and they’re getting back to me on why I have such lousy reception.  Apparently it’s just me.    I just hope they don’t call me back on my cell phone!!

Stay tuned…. the best of 2012 next week!  I’ll probably even talk about where the market is going for real estate!